Listen, you do you ok but I just find Twitter annoying as hell. If it isn’t our problematic president, don’t get me started; its the hoards of sad, sad, people trying to make others sad with them. I admit that I started a Twitter to follow (read stalk) one celebrity, but not in the creepy Annie Wilks way, more of I love you from afar, but would run and hide if I saw you on the street way, there’s a difference. But yes, that was what brought me to Twitter, lol I freely admit that.

I mean he’s HOT, and I have been in love with him since forever, I mean for-ev-er, way before he was famous, and this was my main objective. Social Media can make me feel special just because he might like a Tweet of mine, notice little ole me, a girl can dream, can’t she? I once breathed the same air as him at Walker Stalker, gasp, a fan girl’s dream right? Oh to be in the same room with the man of your dreams? I was one happy fangirl that day, for sure; thirty feet away from all that oozing hotness was just fine with me. I mean really, what would I say to him anyway? I stare at pictures of you way too often? I write dirty fanfiction stories about characters you play in movies and on TV? I hear you smell really good? (Yes, I bought the Keihl’s musk, so I could imagine how he smells. Don’t judge me). That’s not creepy at all, right, RIGHT? Ok, I just outed myself on many levels, but really it’s all there in my feed for everyone’s eyes.

Yay Twitter.

What I do all day, who I worship, whose ass I like, it’s all there for the world to see and I can be as anonymous as I want to be. Twitter was a gold mine, a place to interact with that hot actor and others who felt the same about him. What could be bad? It was heaven on earth I tell you! I signed up for this, gave it all away willingly!

It was all good for a while, really good despite all the fuck boys and dick pics. But now I feel like shouting out into the void has become too commonplace, and these people think they can say anything they want to without repercussions. Last night, while laying in bed with my GH (gorgeous husband) I found myself enraged and aggravated over nothing!

I should have been talking to my daughter who came to tell me about her day or later fucking my husband, but noooooo. I was on Twitter getting mad about Trump, judging peoples selfies, and liking and retweeting bullshit for the masses. I woke up in a bad mood the next morning, way too early I might add and reached for my phone right away…why?

Because I am an addict, plain and simple and this is just another addiction. Tonight the phone goes off at nine pm, come hell or high water and I will not look at it like a psycho when I wake up in the middle of the night. I won’t, I swear to God I won’t! I will be engaged in conversation with my loved ones, I will be present in the moment and I will fuck my husband; it is Saturday night after all.

The best of intentions right? Wish me luck!

By some stroke of cosmic horrifying luck, Twitter is the only App that updates on the reg for me. Go figure right? My cell provider sucks but hey it’s cheap and I am all about the cheap right now. All about it. Who needs Tumblr anyway? I will rant about why I need to be so cheap in another post, suffice to say, my country is going down the tubes at the hand of a dictator, who is, guess what? On Twitter.

I have three Twitter acounts and almost 2500 followers between the three. I do a podcast with my friend about being thirsty for said above celebrity, plus one more hot dude( I’m old, not dead people), and run a Facebook group for writers, yet I do not want this world I created. It’s way too much and there isn’t enough time in the day for all of it.

Today I vow to turn it off, if not for good at least a few hours, it wont be easy but I am determined. I even verbalized it to GH so it’s on now. Goodbye cruel Twitter world, don’t miss me too much and stop trying to slide into my DM’s, unless you’re Norman Reedus.